Shock of the new!

When was the last time you did something new?

When we're successful at one thing we can get stuck in our ways, and remain in our comfort zone for fear of embarrassment or failure. But growth comes from doing new things, from trying new things, from shocking ourselves with new experiences and challenges.

In this week's episode, I share

⚡️how a change in workout routine led to a new discovery;

⚡️giving in to my curiosity led me to coaching; and

⚡️how one 60 minute consultation call with me can leave you thinking differently.

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Transcript

Ryan Spence: 0:00

But here's the thing that's boring. It's boring doing the same thing all the time. Sometimes you've just got to shock yourself. To shock yourself into doing something new. Try something challenge yourself.

Unknown: 0:15

You're listening to, The Triple C Project.

Ryan Spence: 0:24

Welcome to The Triple C Project, the podcast that helps you gain clarity, boost confidence, and build courage, so you can live life lit! I'm your host, Ryan Spence, the BigLaw dropout, life coach, author, speaker, lover of hoodies, hip hop, and big, hairy audacious goals. If you're tired of living the life you think you should want, and ready to start living the life you do want, this podcast will help you get from where you are, to where you really wanna be. So now we're friends, I invite you to grab a drink, take a seat, and allow me to guide you towards living, a life that's lit! Hello! What's up? Welcome to episode 16 of The Triple C Project. And, as has become customary on the show, I don't know how long it takes for something to become customary, but I'm gonna say it's customary. I'm gonna kick off with a review from my book, The Triple C Method gain clarity, boost confidence, and build courage, so you can live life lit. Before I read the review, once something interesting happened this week, and somebody just mentioned with an eye roll on a call that I was on for something else. And it wasn't particularly mean or malicious. But it just the way that they said it and that I'm always talking about my book on social media. And what was interesting about that, for me is not what the person said, but my reaction to it, or non reaction. You see, this is the sort of thing which would have going back a couple of years, stopped me in my tracks and made me start having this conversation with myself saying, See, this is why you you can't do this, and this is why you shouldn't do this, etc, etc, you know, really playing things down. And I would have allowed that comment to dim my light to, I would have stopped sharing, I would have stopped talking I would have kind of retreated into my shell. But the beautiful thing about clarity, the beautiful thing about growth and about clarity is that when you're clear as to why you're doing something, as I've said before, it's very easy to make decisions and to understand why you're doing it and to keep going. And the thing is I wrote the book not as a vanity project, because if it was I would have just paid some ghostwriter to write it for me. I wrote it because it's the book that I wish that I had had when I was struggling in BigLaw, in that mental quicksand and not really knowing how to get out of it not knowing how to escape the situation that I was in. And I wrote the book to help other people like me to start to have these conversations. Yes, with me as a coach would be great. But even if they just had them with themselves to start questioning things that they had been told the way that they had been living and the things that they thought they were capable of doing. So there's a very clear mission, a very clear purpose and a very clear reason for writing this book. And because I wrote the book for those reasons, I feel I have to, it's my duty to tell people about it. And not everyone will care. Not everyone will read it. And that's fine. That's not who the book is for. The book is for the people who hear the story who hear what I'm saying. And instantly think I can relate to that. That's where I am. That's where I've been. And I want to hear how I pulled myself out of it and see what tips and insights and takeaways they can get from it too. So all of this is to say, I'm not going to stop talking about the book. Because the book helps people and they know the book helps people because you the readers tell me people send me messages, the reviews are written. And so the more that I talk about it, the more people will hear and the more people will be helped. So what's the lesson in there for you? The lesson there for you is again, clarity, know why you're doing something because it's very easy then to stick to what it is that you're doing because you have a very clear vision ahead of you. And no matter what anyone else says no matter about anyone else's opinion, that's not gonna knock you off your strike because you're very strong and solid in your reasons for doing the thing that it is that you do. Okay, slightly different intro this week because that's not actually the topic of this week's podcast. But before I get to that, let me read out the review which precipitated this whole or it's not really a rant. It's more of a a, more of a commentary, let's call it that. Okay, so this week's review of The Triple C Method is from Neeyra who is a life coach. And the extract I'm going to read is this, Neeryra says, I would describe this as the kick in the ass you need to make you start thinking about, Am I really living the life I want to live? And I think that last point is key. Well, actually, all of it is but the kick in the ass. Sometimes we need that kick in the ass to get us moving something to just shock us into action. And start asking yourself, Am I really living the life I want to live? Because we can sit in that mundanity sit in that comfort? And we know it isn't really but we're too scared to ask ourselves the question. So if my book, as Neeyra says it did for her, can give you that loving kick to shock you into action to shock you into asking yourself the questions and taking the actions that you haven't been taken so far haven't been asking so far, then I'm happy. That's what it is meant to do. So thank you for that. And if you haven't yet, got your copy of The Triple C Method, what are you waiting for? If you listen to this podcast, you like this podcast, you follow me on social media, you're going to want to read the book. So head over to Amazon or go to your favourite independent bookseller and ask them to order it in for you. And pick it up. Trust me, this book will. It has all my insights and you learn a lot more about me where I'm coming from my background, why I say the things that I say and do the things that I do. And I think actually, no, I know that. If you've been in big law, if you're you've been in a stressful corporate environment, you're going to see some parallels with your own life and be able to take some of the insights and also work through some of the exercises that are in there to help you move from a life of lethargy to a life that's lit. And don't forget to download the workbook as well there's a link in the book to get your free workbook which will allow you to work through the exercises so that the book doesn't become one of those things which you read you think is good, you get inspired by and then you put on your shelf and don't look at it again. But it's one way you're then inspired to go ahead and take the action and I've made it very easy for you to then take that action. So The Triple C Method gain clarity, boost confidence, and build courage so you can live life lit! Amazon, Waterstones, Barnes and Noble, your favourite independent bookseller, wherever you pick up books, go ahead and grab yourself a copy. And yeah, paperback and ebook. And I'll be recording the audio book soon. But more about that in the coming weeks. Okay, this week's episode, I want to talk about doing new things, maintaining an open mind than maybe doing things that you haven't done before or haven't thought about doing before. And this is inspired by something that happened to me this week. So the kids were away, which was fantastic. They're away my in laws for a few days. And so I had some time, home time that I didn't usually have and I kind of wanted to go to the gym that I hadn't been to for for a while. A class I hadn't been to for a good while just because it hadn't really worked with the schedule. And that would normally be boxing. If you've read the book, or you've heard me talk about my backstory, you know that I boxed for quite a while, about a year or two when I was back in Singapore, and I really love boxing. And it's something that's just really helps to mentally and physically get me energised and kind of get me into a zone. But the place where I go to to box here in Sheffield, it's called Box bar, and they do boxing. And they also do barre. And I've never been to a barre class, I'd heard of barre. But the boxing class, the timing didn't work. Because on that particular day, that Saturday, I was going to have to go and pick up my delightful children for my in laws, which was a six hour round trip. So I need to get to the earliest class that morning. And it wasn't boxing, it was bar. So I thought about setting it off. I'm just not doing anything. But, you know, I figured look, I could use this kid free morning to sleep in. But then it's filled it rubbishing myself later. And actually, the person that I am is doesn't do that the person that I am, gets up and gets their ass in gear and gets moving. So that's what I did jump to my car and headed to the gym at the start of our class. Now, I didn't really know what to expect. There were basically three things I knew about bar. It was something that I knew was derived from ballet, it had some of the ballet moves and that sort of thing in and uses a ballet bar I knew that or in all the pictures that I'd seen, it was mainly done by women. But then I mean, I did yoga years ago when I was often the only male in the class. So that didn't really faze me. And I also sort of knew from from anecdotes that I've heard that it's harder than it looks. If you don't know what bar is, you can you can go Google it barre b-a-r-r-e, not the bar, you go to drink at. And generally, you'll get images of women, kind of ballet dancer looking types, doing sort of stretches that are holding on to a bar, that's that sort of thing. And whilst, again, sometimes people can say this about yoga, it might look quite gentle, I had heard that it's actually quite, quite hardcore. It's a lot of strength, endurance, coordination, incorporated in all of that movement. So having done a barre class, and I'll talk a little bit about that in a second. What I now know about a barre class is, it's derived from ballet. It's mainly done by women. And yeah, it's harder than it looks. So effectively, the same three things. But I love that. And here's the thing, trying something new, really expand your mind, expand your horizons, and it allows you to grow, no matter what the outcome of trying that new thing, you're going to get something out of it. And I think as high performing successful, ambitious people that you are, we want to be good at stuff, right. And when we find something that we're good at, I mean, generally, our jobs, our careers, we want to stay doing that thing, because it gives us that comfort, it allows us to know what we're doing, it allows us to be seen in a particular way, allows us to have a certain identity and a certain status. And to deviate from that to try something new risk failure, this is falling off that pedestal that we may have put ourselves on or that other people have put us on the it'd be the person who just gets shut down the person who can just cruise through life and with ease, and who can really just smash everything that's put in front of them. But here's the thing, that's boring. It's boring, doing the same thing all the time. Sometimes you've just got to shock yourself, to shock yourself into doing something new. Try something challenge yourself. Now for me with barre. Yes, boxing is something that I'm comfortable with, I still find it challenging, but I generally know what I'm doing. With barre, I had no clue. And I was literally led by the instructor. And the instructor was great. She was just really good. And it turns out that my yoga background did help with some of the moves. Funny point, she actually said to me at one point that my downward dog was great. She really complimented me on my downward dog, which if you don't know is a pose in yoga. And there was a part of me that just wanted to bask in the glory that I was, I was this novice about and being confident in my downward dog and really take that with me. But values, one of my values is integrity. So I did Fess up. I told her that I'm actually a yoga teacher and I teach this shit. So yeah, I thanked her for her compliment, but I had to at least let her know that. Yeah, this is kind of what I do. I couldn't just take take all the glory. Anyway, I digress. Back to barre. But yeah, the workout was challenging, and it was energised energising, but I love that, and I'm going to go next week. And here's the thing, if I hadn't just taken that chance to try something new. And if I had stuck to what I know, I never would have figured that out, I would have always been looking at the outside of this thing thinking that either that's not for me, or it's too hard. And I can't do it, when the fact is you can do it. And you can figure anything out right, if you want to badly enough. And this whole thing of trying something new, it kind of reminds me of when I first got introduced to coaching. I might many people have heard about coaching for years. And it was to me something that senior executives got from their companies to help them progress to the next level and to leadership position positions. So it was never really something for me and it was never really something that I explored as possible for me or that could help me and looking back if I had done that sooner, maybe I would have saved myself. Five years of pain of of spinning out of not really believing that I could do whatever it was that I I wanted to do. Because once I actually did start coaching, did hire a coach, I quickly figured out that, damn, this is amazing. This really is changing my thought process. It's really changing the vision that I see for myself. It's just changing what I think is possible. But I had to shock myself into that, I had to take that leap, do something which I never done before and allow myself to sit in a room with another person and be vulnerable be completely open, put on a mask no as now graces. And I had to experience that and inexperience in that I gained so much. So that's really the point of this episode. I want you to think about once you've finished listening, when was the last time you tried something new? If you can't think of anything, think of the question. When was the last time you had the opportunity to try something new? And why did you not take up that opportunity? What was the resistance where where were the roadblocks. And I want you to explore that within yourself. Because the more that we get entrenched in our current position, the more that we stay fixed in our comfort zone, the less that we grow. And the deeper we sink into a life of lethargy. Because we're meant to grow, we're meant to expand. This isn't about hustle and being the most productive you can be etc, etc. It's about you, self actualizing, it's about you, maximising the joy, the pleasure, the lightness that you get out of your life, you can only do that if you are growing. And you can only grow if you try new things, if you maintain an open mind, if you expand your horizons. Because you never know what you might find out about yourself, and you never know what you might enjoy. If you try something new, if you just take that little step into the unknown. So that's it for me this week. I guess if I was to leave you with one message, it would be this this week, try And here's how you can find out with basically only 60 minutes something you look at something you haven't done before. Or if of your time book a consultation call, you'll get on a call with me. And we'll just work through some things helped you to start somebody presents you with an opportunity that you're not to look at things a little bit differently. And you'll get to experience a little bit of a little taster of what coaching quite sure about that might seem a little bit interesting. Just is, and what coaching can do for you. And it's an hour, it's no try it, see what happens. And whether you enjoy it or not. obligation, but you will think differently. And this could be you're trying something new. So go head to iamryanspence.com. Make a note of what you learned about yourself in that Click Work with me and book yourself a consultation call. situation. Maybe you learned that you can do hard things, There'll be few questions. So I can just get a sense as to where you are and where I might be able to help you. And then we'll maybe you learned that you're more open minded than you get on a call and we'll have a good chat. And we'll see if thought you were. Maybe you learned that you like something we're a good fit. And you could decide whether this is something that can work for you that can help you get from your life of new, there could be a whole host of things. But this is how we lethargy, towards living a life that's lit. 'Til next week. Thanks for tuning in to The Triple C Project. If you like begin to find out who we really are by trying things that the show, don't keep it to yourself. Go ahead, tell a friend and tell me too by leaving a review. To get more challenges that maybe scare us a little bit and keeping record of tips, tools, strategies to help you get from where you are to where you want to be, head to iamryanspence.com. Download my the outcome. And if like me, you've heard about this whole free confidence journal. Don't forget to follow me on world of coaching and think that it's not something that can help Instagram. I'm @iam_ryanspence. And you'll be the first to know about the release of my upcoming book, The Triple C Method. But you. It's not something that's really for you. I'd like to for now, the only thing that I have left to say is, stop living a life of lethargy and start living life lit! dispel that myth.