The Triple C Project

The Perfect Time To Start Is Now: You're Not Too Old and It's Not Too Late

• Ryan Spence • Season 2 • Episode 108

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Feeling stuck in an unfulfilling job or life path? What if you could turn it all around, no matter your age? Join me on this episode of the Triple C Project as I shatter the myth that it's ever too late to chase your dreams and explore how to break free from societal expectations and self-imposed limitations, helping you build the confidence and courage to live a life that truly lights you up. 

Tune in and transform the way you think about time, success, and your own potential.

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Speaker 1:

Stop. If you do one thing after this episode, I want it to be that you stop that. You stop telling yourself that time has passed and that where you are is where you'll always be. You're always going to be stuck in this job that is sucking your soul. You're always going to be stuck in this life that has you constantly on the go and feeling exhausted and burnt out all the time. You're listening to the Triple C Project. Welcome to the Triple C Project, the podcast that helps you gain clarity, boost confidence, build courage so you can live life lit. I'm your host, ryan Spence, the Big Law Dropout, life coach author, speaker, lover of hoodies, hip-hop and big, hairy, audacious goals. If you're tired of living the life you think you should want, and ready to start living the life you do want, this podcast will help you get from where you are to where you really want to be. So now we're friends. I invite you to grab a drink, take a seat and allow me to guide you towards living a life that's lit. What's up. Welcome to episode 108 of the Triple C Project, another week and another year older. If you listened to last week's episode, you'll know it was my birthday, so it was good. I had very chilled out not morning, but afternoon, and then the day after my birthday was spent really just chilling out, reading books and, yeah, catching up on some much needed sleep. So it's fantastic, and I need more days like that. That's what I learned In other news.

Speaker 1:

My book, the Draft, went off to the editor on Monday, so it is now being edited as we speak. I've done things a little bit backwards this time around, because what's supposed to happen is I'm supposed to finish the draft. Happen is I'm supposed to finish the draft, then send it out to beta readers, then input any feedback or changes based upon the beta readers feedback and then send it to the editor. But my timing has just not worked out that way for various reasons, and so it's gone, but I will be sending it out to beta readers. So if you are keen, interested, a little bit nosy, and want to get a first read of the raw draft and be able to shape the book, make any comments, share your insights and all that good stuff, I'd love for you to drop me a line and come on board. You can send me a text by clicking the link in the show description that allows you to send a text or you can, you know, contact me by the usual channels I mentioned email, hey, at IamRyanSpencecom, or over on Instagram at Iam underscore Ryan Spence, or over on LinkedIn, and just say hey, like to be a beta reader, and I will give you the deets as to what that entails, um, and the deadline for reading and getting feedback to me. Um, if you think I have nothing to offer, please don't think that every beta reader for my first book, the triple C method, uh, was fantastic and gave some amazing feedback, um, and insights, um, and it really kind of helped to shape the book, not necessarily making wholesale changes, but just things that kind of made it just flow better, read better, pop better. So your input is going to be extremely valuable. So I would love for you to come on board. We're looking for that five people. But, um, I would love for you to come on board, um, we're looking for that five people, um, but beyond that, I'll also be looking for people to join the launch squad, um, which I'll talk more about, um, as I get closer to uh, to the book launch. So if that's something you'd be interested in, um, but maybe you can't fit in being a beta reader right now. But again, drop me a line and just let me know you want to be in the launch squad and I will shoot you the deets as and when they become available.

Speaker 1:

All right, this week I am going to talk about time Time. One thing I found with clients is that a lot of the time when we drill down and finally get to open up about what their dreams are, the life they want, the things they want to do, a recurring theme is that they believe that it's too late, that they're out of time. Now. The clients I work with tend to be at the mid to senior level in their career. So, anyway, for anywhere from sort of mid thirties upwards, and because of the conditioning, the societal condition about where we should be in life at any given moment, um, I mean the age that we should, uh, have gone to university, we should have got our first job, we should have got married, got our first house, had our kids. Um, you know what I mean Reached a particular status in our married, got our first house, had our kids. You know I mean reached a particular status in our careers. All of those things, all of these milestones.

Speaker 1:

There's this thing that gets into our head into our unconscious mind, sometimes even our conscious mind, that by the time you've got to a particular age, if you haven't hit certain milestones, you're a failure. And even if you have hit those milestones, you've just got to keep going, because it's kind of you're too late, you're too deep in, too far in to start to think about anything else, to start to do something new, and now that's fine. If you are someone who just doesn't want to do something new, like, for example, with me, I have no desire to ever, ever, study and do exams again. I love learning and I will read books until the day I die and take information and learn new skills and maybe take courses and stuff. But the idea of going back into academia and doing exams, I don't want to do that, and it's not because I think it's too late, it's because I just don't want to do it. That's fine. But if you're telling yourself the story that you can't do something because of where you are in life, because of your age, because time has passed, I want to, in this episode, dispel that notion because you are holding yourself back when you don't need to. It's completely unnecessary. I completely understand why you would do that, though, because, again, of this societal conditioning.

Speaker 1:

I remember when I went back to do my law degree, when I left music and decided I was going to go back to uni and I was actually going to complete a degree this time and do law, and in my first week I was speaking to the lecturer and because I was concerned that by the time I qualified, I, by the time I graduated, that I would too old, that law firms wouldn't be interested in looking at my CV, let alone hiring me, because I wouldn't be a fresh faced graduate coming out of uni at 21, 22. I mean, I would be a little bit older than that. And she obviously had heard this before, because she kind of looked at me and she said well, how old are you? And I was 28, can you believe that? Like at 28, I was thinking I was too old and she kind of brushed it off just like well, of course not. I mean, that's kind of not a problem. You're going to be in your early 30s when you, when you graduate, like I've seen people, I've had students who are older than you who have gone on to have successful legal career, so you've got nothing to worry about. But again, this was something that was in my head because I hadn't gone the traditional route and I hadn't hit almost any of the milestones that you were expected to hit by society at those points. So if this is something that you're doing, this episode is really going to hopefully well, hopefully go to change your viewpoint, change your mind on that Now.

Speaker 1:

So when I moving gears slightly, when I sit down in the morning for my meditation, one thing that I do is post meditation is I read passages from certain books that I have only short ones, to kind of get me to think about things differently. Sometimes I'll journal on them, sometimes I'll sit and ponder them, sometimes I'll come back to them throughout the day, and I have a selection of books in my little drawer next to my meditation cushion, one of which is the Daily Stoic and its companion book, the Daily Dad, which is, if you don't know, the Daily Stoic, ryan Holiday is. He takes sort of Stoic principles and kind of presents them for the modern day, presents them for for the modern day. And the Daily Stoic is a book with where for each day of the year, there is a, a quote and a passage from Stoicism, um and um, which, which I really like, and the Daily Dad is the along the same vein, but it's it's really for parents. It's kind of Stoicism but looking through the lens of a parent and how you kind of um approach parenthood basically. Anyway, I said that to you.

Speaker 1:

I say that because, um, there was a passage that I read back on the 25th of June which really gets to the topic of today's episode, and when I was recounting that my own episode of being 28 and thinking I was too old to be a lawyer and it's something that I talk about in the new book when I saw this passage I was like that exactly speaks to the same thing that I was going through Now. The quote is from somebody called Dr Edith Eger, who I hadn't heard of before, but she wrote a book called the Choice. She's an Auschwitz survivor and now, I think, a renowned psychologist, and in her book, the Choice, she talks about when she was thinking about getting a PhD in psychology. And I'll read the quote which is taken from her book here to kind of illustrate what I'm talking about. So the quote goes I told my principal I was considering getting my doctorate in psychology, but I couldn't speak my dream without a caveat, I don't know. I said by the time I finish school, I'll be 50. He smiled at me. You're going to be 50 anyhow, he said, and it's so true.

Speaker 1:

I said in the previous episode that time's going to pass anyway. So who do you want to be when it does? And that same principle applies here. If you have a dream, something that you're burning to do, that really lights you up, why are you going to let time stop you? Because that time is going to pass. There's no way. There's no way that you can stop it. My kids have this really annoying thing where they won't do what they're supposed to do and then they will turn around later and say I want to have the same time that I would have had if I'd done the thing in the first place. And for two intelligent boys, I'd say to them this is ridiculous, because you should know that can't stop time. Time doesn't wait, it will continue. And that's the same thing here. The time has passed and the time will continue to pass.

Speaker 1:

So do you want it to pass, with you still lamenting the fact that your dream hasn't come to fruition, that you haven't tried to do the thing or things that you really want to do, that you're passionate about. You haven't attempted to make the changes in your life to allow you to live life the way that you want to live it. Allow you to live life lit, because time doesn't have to hold you back. You can start any time you want to, and I want you to, if you are doing this, to stop. If you do one thing after this episode, I want it to be that you stop that. You stop telling yourself that time has passed and that where you are is where you'll always be. You're always going to be stuck in this job that is sucking your soul. You're always going to be stuck in this job that is sucking your soul. You're always going to be stuck in this life that has you constantly on the go and feeling exhausted and burnt out all the time. I want you to stop telling yourself that the life that you chose or the life that you have been given because, again, I think that some of the things we think we've chosen is actually we've been conditioned to choose but I want you to stop telling yourself that you just have to accept it if it's not working for you, and I want you to stop telling yourself that you're too old or that you're too far gone to follow your dreams, because none of it's true. It's all stories that we tell ourselves. It's all stories that society tell us, but it isn't true.

Speaker 1:

And there were so many examples of this and I'm going to share just a handful with you here that I came across when I was doing the research for my book. So my kids and I have recently finished watching the Star Wars movies like all nine of them. It turned into this whole saga and now they're obsessed by Star Wars. But it was fun, it's something we did together, and I mentioned that because if you have ever watched Star Wars, you know Harrison Ford. That was kind of his breakout role. He was like a bit part actor before that, trying to kind of build his acting career but working as a carpenter to just make ends meet, really to make money. And he didn't get his role as Han Solo in Star Wars until he was 35. Right, so he wasn't straight out of drama school, he wasn't in his early to mid twenties, he was 35. He was already working. He wasn't in his early to mid twenties, he was 35. He was already working. He already had a quote, unquote proper job. But he didn't give up on his dream. He kept going, he got that and he's never looked back.

Speaker 1:

Vera Wang, the famous bridal wear designer I mean, if you, particularly in the, I think, in the early two thousands, late nineties, particularly in the, I think, in the early 2000s, late 90s, early 2000s like every celebrity getting married is wearing a Vero 1 gown. But I recently found out that she was in the fashion industry for 20 years. Before she launched her debut line of bridal gowns, she was 40. 40. Now if she thought 40, I'm too old, that ship has sailed. Yeah, she probably could have gone on and still had a pretty successful career in the fashion industry, but she would have given up on her dream of having her own bridal gown, bridal line even and you know all of the things that have flowed from that for her just wouldn't have happened, purely because she had decided to hold herself back. Helen Mirren oh, the amazing Helen Mirren, the actress. She was acting for years, you know, and she had a pretty, I guess a pretty successful career, you could say, depending on how you define success, you know, I mean on the stage and in movies. But she didn't get her first Oscar nomination, which she eventually won until she was 61.

Speaker 1:

And the one that I love, the one that I always come back to, is Samuel L Jackson. I mean, Samuel L Jackson is the man right, and I mean his breakout role, not his first. And I mean his breakout role, not his first acting role, but his breakout role was as Jules Winfield in that amazing movie, one of my most favourite movies of all times Pulp Fiction. And he was 45 years old 45 years old when he got that role. If he'd given up on his dream in his late 20s because okay, growing up to the age of 30, I need to go out and get a proper job, you know what I mean or whatever other story he was telling himself or society was telling him, we never would have had that iconic role and we never would have had the Samuel L Jackson that we know and love today and we never would have had the Samuel L Jackson that we know and love today. So this is, but this isn't about acting or being famous, but it's just to demonstrate that there is no such thing as being too late.

Speaker 1:

Okay, if you want to score the winning goal in the football World Cup final or you want to win a hundred meter gold at the Olympics, then yeah, admittedly, there probably is going to be an age limit. Right, your body can only take you so far, but anything else, really, you're not. There is no time limit, except the time limit that you place, place upon yourself. So what are you waiting for? What's stopping you from starting now? Not tomorrow, not wishing you'd started yesterday, but just starting now, just doing the thing, just taking steps to do the thing, whatever it is that you want to do. That you want to do Because the time is going to pass anyway.

Speaker 1:

As the lecturer said to Dr Edith Iger about her doctorate, you're going to be 50 anyhow. So there's no point worrying that, oh, I'm going to be 50 when I'm done, or 55 or 60 or whatever the age is going to be, because you're going to be that anyway. So you can be that and have not tried, and be in the same position that you're in now. Or you can be that age and have tried and have maybe done the thing, or, if not, learn a hell of a lot about yourself in the process of doing the thing and gain a whole lot more clarity as to where you want your life to go, what it is you want to do and just generally who you are.

Speaker 1:

I have a client who recently completed a course that they started just after we first started working together, and again, it's been a long process, but if they hadn't started then they'd still be here today, four years on, thinking maybe I should start it, but is it too late? And having this conversation where they're wrestling in their own head about whether it's too late, whether they've got the time, whether it's the right time. But they just went ahead and did it and now it's done, and it's amazing. But they just went ahead and did it and now it's done, and it's amazing. And I'm so pleased for them. And that's what I want for you.

Speaker 1:

Whatever is there bubbling away inside of you, whatever pops into your mind and makes you just feel all warm and fuzzy and excited, I want you to get after it. Stop thinking about is it possible, is it too late? Is it realistic? Because the time is just going to flow by through all that thinking. So why not just get started? Figure out what the first few steps are going to be and get started and see where it takes you.

Speaker 1:

It doesn't have to be some huge ordeal where you burn down your entire life to start something completely new. It can be something that you just decide. You're going to carve time for every day, every couple of days, to just work on, to start to fuel that tiny spark inside of you that wants to do that thing, that wants to create something new for yourself, that wants to create a new way of living for yourself, that wants to see where your potential can take you. Just carve out that time and start now. Stop thinking about it being too late. Stop thinking that you have to continue on the same path you're on without any deviations. If that's not what you want to do because, as I keep saying, and I will keep saying and reiterating that time will pass. There is no law about when you have to have done something by or when you have to give up on something. It's just a story that you tell yourself and the story that society tells you. If you want to do it, no reason why you can't start it. So I encourage you to do that. Start right now.

Speaker 1:

I wrote my first book back in 2022. I'm releasing my second book in 2024, in my forties, like if I told myself that ship has sailed, it's too late, I can't release a book now. That first book, the triple C method never would have been released and it never would have helped the people that it's helped, never would have inspired the people that it's inspired. Um, so we can get in our own way if we allow ourself. But if we just stop for a moment, really connect with what's right for us, with what aligns with our values, with how we want to live our life, with where we see ourselves going, and then do that, shutting out all of the noise, ignoring all of the societal expectations, we could be the person. You could be the person that inspires the next person to do the same. You'll create that ripple effect of inspiration, of motivation, of whatever it is.

Speaker 1:

So kind of look at it as a duty. Like I've said before, when I kind of get bogged down in things and I kind of think, oh, do I want to do this? And I look at it through that lens of service over ego, I look at it as a duty. I have a duty to share my experiences, to share what I've learned, what I've gained on this quest that I'm on, earned, what I've gained on this quest that I'm on because it could help somebody else and it has. It does help other people. So I have to be out there to do this work.

Speaker 1:

So what is it that you need to do? What is it that you have to do to really set your soul alight, to set you free from your mental cell, from the societal conditioning, and how can that create a ripple effect around you? Think about those questions and then get started right now, after you listen to this episode, get started. Don't wait. Don't tell yourself it's too late, because it's not. There's no such thing as too late. And if you still are thinking this sounds good and I'm fired up, but I just don't know where to get started, that's exactly what I do. That's exactly what I help clients with.

Speaker 1:

I've helped clients rekindle their dreams of being a writer and got started on that. Get started writing. I've helped them go off and get their master's degree. I've helped them find their new job, find their new calling in life. I've helped them create their side hustle that, eventually, is going to be the thing that helps them to create the life it is that they want to live. I've helped them find all of those things. I've helped them find the clarity and the confidence and the courage to make those things happen. And that's what I can help you with too, and that's what I can help you with too. Head to iamryanspencecom slash apply. Watch the short video there and send me an application for your free strategy session so you can see the power of coaching, you can see how this can help you and you can stop telling yourself stories about it being too late and you can get started on the path that you're meant to be on. Stop creating the life that you want to live. Stop living a life of lethargy. Start living life.

Speaker 1:

Thanks for tuning in to the Triple C Project. In the spirit of the Triple C, here's three things that you can do to support the show. Head to ratethispodcastcom. Slash triple C or over to your favorite podcast app and leave a review. Reviews really help people checking out shows to see what they can expect and how the show can help them. Second thing you can do share. Share this episode, share a previous episode with a friend, someone who you feel could benefit from what I'm throwing down on this here show. And number three head to IamRyanSpencecom. Get on the mailing list. I'll be sharing news about the show, news about what I'm up to my new book, start writing soon. So to be the first to be in the know. You need to get yourself on the list. Really appreciate you being here and until next week, stop living a life of lethargy. Start living life lit.